Tuesday, June 9, 2020

Fog City

                                                    Sister Susan's Seventieth Birthday

Pandemic. Virus. Isolation. Sheltering. Police. Murder. Death. Protests. Riots. Looting.

These are the times we live in. Mentally and physically taxing our senses. I have to examine daily the entire gamut of emotions. It's a veritable roller coaster ride. Thrust into this mixing bowl of uncertain ingredients was my sister's birthday.

My brother Casey and I discussed months ago the absolute need to be with her on her 70th birthday. We are now old. A condition unthinkable not so long ago, but here we are. Limitations abound. Unfortunately she is most affected by limitations. She lives below the poverty line in an unforgiving tract of high desert. Stuck. The only redemptive quality is she can dip her toes in the cool Colorado river when temperatures settle at 110 degrees. She's alone. She's suffered ongoing culture shock for the long 25 years she's been in Bullhead City. Hence the importance of our being there.

Casey and I put our heads together trying to form a travel plan. A back story surfaced as a template for such a journey. You see in 1977 Susan was in a difficult situation. She lived in Chicago and her little world had crumbled. Casey and I lived here in San Francisco. She reached out to us for help rescuing her. We didn't hesitate. Casey had a classic Pontiac Catalina convertible road tested and ready to go. We set sail non stop arriving in the Windy City in 40 hours. She was grateful to see us. The car was loaded, we reversed course and headed due West. A memorable trip!

Initially we planned to load Casey's van with lawn chairs, a cooler, and other amenities for the long 10 hour drive to Arizona. A certain reenactment of that awesome 43 year old journey of brotherly love. We tried to discount vision problems, bad backs, stiff knees, pot bellies, and other assorted maladies. It would be historic. Lucky for me, his son Drew desired to go which changed the dynamic. He was flying in from Boston on the wrong day at the wrong time. Everything changed. The new timeline wasn't conducive for me. My enthusiasm drained. I even thought of bowing out, but that would be shamefully inexcusable. I needed to honor her long struggle. Frankly the change in plans worked better for me. I flew to Vegas, an hour and a half, rented a car and drove the 90 miles to her house, easy peasy.

I arrived a day ahead of Casey and Drew, which allowed me and Sue time to catch up uninterrupted. I hadn't visited her in probably 10 years. Our hug was deeply felt and emotional, significant because of our age and mortality. She launched into showing me all the detailed work she'd done making ready her humble abode. It was stunning. So much to see and linger over, while listening to the labor involved over the previous month. I commented adoringly it was a 3D mixed media art display on a grand scale. She should charge admission. She talked and talked interspersing reminisces with recent happenings, painting a large splendid picture of her life over time.

The next afternoon the boys rolled in like thunder. Casey drove alone from San Francisco to Las Vegas because Drew changed his plans. To arrive at Sue's a bit earlier, Drew flew to Vegas where Casey picked him up. A long tiring drive for old Casey but he's a good sport. Casey presented the birthday girl a beautiful bouquet, a grand gesture, while Drew hauled the cooler of iced beer out of the van. Once greeted and seated Casey broke out the cigars and the love fest was underway. The joy of being together at last was infectious and laughter reigned or rained.

There were no extravagant plans for her birthday. Just being in each others presence was the balm needed. We did enjoy a delicious lunch at her favorite local spot, high on a hill overlooking the valley. She had her heart set on a Rueben sandwich with German potato salad, washing it down with a margarita, and wasn't disappointed. When back outside we were gobsmacked by the suffocating heat. Her usual ritual is to submerge herself and a lawn chair in the cold rushing water of the Colorado river, not 500 yards from her front door. Needless to say we all followed for the refreshing dunking. We spent the better part of the day sitting near the shore while the waves lapped up around us neutralizing the stifling heat. Later in the evening as the moon rose and the temperature dropped to 101, we ordered delivery from her favorite Italian restaurant. We enjoyed a leisurely dinner with Spumoni ice cream for dessert. The banter was light and as refreshing as the cool river waters. Old family members remembering childhood, and the experiences that bound us. A much needed stroll down memory lane, ending with genuine hugs of endless love.

Happy Birthday Susan Ellen Raher!!








These black and white photos are from 1977. The scene is the Great Salt Flats.
We stopped for a break and a Kodak minute!
We were driving from Chicago to San Francisco!






















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